Look, I’m almost willing to overlook the fact that Bible actually defines marriage as a covenant between a man and a woman, a man and a woman and dozens of concubines, a man and several wives, a rapist and a woman, a man’s brother and a woman, a man and his aunt, etc. etc., because I realize that you said “the Bible tells [you]“, and who am I to interpret what an inanimate object is whispering to you late at night when no one else is around? If you believe that that’s what marriage is or should be, then fine! That’s what you think marriage is. Great for you.

But if you also think that the Bible tells you that you can’t stamp a piece of paper because you’ll be complicit in some evil deed, then you should not have a job that requires you to stamp a piece of paper. You should get a new job. Have you tried cooking meth? The Bible says literally nothing about meth. Nothing.

—Rebecca Watson, “Dear Theist: Do Your Job or Find Another”


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